Ten Tips For “Wellness” (if you are stupid that is…)

Here at Australian Traveller magazine we get bombarded with press releases. Some are really helpful. Most aren’t.

I understand that it’s a tough gig for PR companies to continually try and manufacture “news” about their client. Especially when they are hotels. Imagine trying to create a “news” item about a hotel every week in order to justify your retainer?

The end result is more and more tenuous press releases. That I am sure that the people putting them out are embarrassed by. And without further ado I introduce you to this weeks doozie…

This comes from a well known international spa and resort. And their news? The TOP TEN WELLBEING TIPS! Okay. What delightful nuggets of enlightenment have you got for me?

I kid you not. Here is their top 10 tips for improving your wellbeing.

                 1. Reduce Stress

                 2. Protect Yourself from Pollution

                 3. Keep a Positive Mental Attitude

                 4. Move More

                 5. Cut out Fat

                 6. Avoid Alcohol

                7. Brush Your Teeth

                8. Make Something

                9. Have a Smoothie

               10. Drink Water

Seriously!!!! I am not Sherlock fucking Holmes, but I was fairly certain that doing the inverse of this list (being stressed, eating lots of fat, not exercising or not brushing my teeth) would make me less, well, “well”.

This was sent to me as a press release. Someone actually checked the spelling. Made sure the grammar was good, and at some point said “That’s great. We’ll send it out now”. The guys at Australian Traveller magazine will be happy to let their readers know about such ground breaking news…..