Value favourite Travelodge Hotels promises to be “refreshingly simple” so how does it stack up against its natural enemy, the hipster hotel.
1. Convenient locations
Travelodge Hotels: 17 locations in Australia (and New Zealand) in places you actually need a hotel, like in Melbourne’s Southbank, which is walking distance to Crown Casino and Entertainment Complex, and downtown Sydney, close to Museum Station and the cafe-rich inner city suburbs of Surry Hills, Darlinghurst and Paddington.
Hipster hotel: In a laneway, off another laneway, in the coolest part of town which is nowhere near where you actually want to go.
2. A breakfast that genuinely breaks the fast
Travelodge Hotels: A hearty breakfast with plenty of options, hot and cold, such as bacon, sausages, roma tomatoes, eggs; plus a range of fruit, cereal, yoghurt and pastries. In true buffet style, it’s all you can eat. Options range from $8 to $22.
Hipster hotel: Kale smoothie served in a mason jar, foraged kimchi breakfast tacos and a decaf cold brew coffee – served from a food truck somewhere vaguely nearby.
3. Cook your own?
Travelodge Hotels: You don’t need to eat out every single night. Travelodge Hotels’ kitchenette has everything you need – a microwave, kettle, mini-fridge, even a kitchen sink – without going too MasterChef on you.
Hipster hotel: You want a kitchen in your room? Where would we put the post-modern sculptures?
4. Check out the checkout time
Travelodge Hotels: Sleep in! Check out time is 11am.
Hipster hotel: We are early adopters so we choose to throw you out at 10am.
5. Extras, extras
Travelodge Hotels: Keepin’ it simple and uncluttered with complimentary tea, coffee and useful utensils in the kitchenette and Travelodge-Hotels-exclusive shampoo, conditioner, body wash and lotions in the bathroom. For anything else, reception will do their level best for you.
Hipster hotel: High-end soap, single-origin boutique teas, the fluffiest robes and slippers money can buy plus a mini-bar stocked with exorbitantly priced liqueurs. Why does the room cost so much again?
6. Shower off, not show off
Travelodge Hotels: A shower that just leaves you feeling refreshed (and wet).
Hipster hotel: Six body-massage jets that flood the bathroom floor and taps that you need a manual to use.
Travelodge Hotels: Free Wi-Fi for the length of your stay with reasonably priced packages for the serious data-eating internet addicts.
Hipster hotel: $20 a day sounds about right, whether you use a little or a lot. Probably cheaper to use your mobile data!
8. Sleepy deals
Travelodge Hotels: Book your stay on Tuesday and receive bonus goodies such as 2-for-1 breakfast, unlimited free Wi-Fi or late check-out.
Hipster hotel: How can we pay for the thread count if we give you a discount?
9. The Bed
Travelodge Hotels: Makes its own beds (literally), designed to support, with non-allergenic pillows and duvets.
Hipster hotel: Sometimes you just don’t need to sleep on a mattress filled with a curious mix of pure cotton, wool, mohair and horsetail hair.
10. Simple touches
Travelodge Hotels: Artworks that reflect the local area plus some nifty designed new pillows and other small touches that make the rooms down-to-earth and refreshingly comfortable.
Hipster hotel: There is no such thing as simple.