Julia Morris: A funny thing happened on my way today…

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Funnily enough, stand-up comedian, House Husband actress and Logies presenter Julia Morris is something of a travel expert, having spent the better part of her working life travelling around Australia’s far flung landscape. Here she shares the best and worst of her adventures with Steve Madgwick:

Any tawdry back-stage Logies’ goss that you can divulge?

I was only out until about 1am, which is when most of the parties started. My days of hanging out and fanging out are over – I get too excited about sleeping. There’s hardly any gossip anymore anyway because everything is leaked out by selfies.

You are a comedian, writer, actress, presenter etc – how do you describe yourself to people who haven’t met you?

Very down to earth – on every level… Oh, you mean my job description? I just turn up to entertainment, that’s all.

You must be on the road a lot for your various day jobs; do you enjoy travelling?

I do enjoy it – and I don’t travel just for my stand-up work either. I’ve lived in many, many different countries (UK, South Africa, Los Angeles, New Caledonia, Bali, Japan) so I’m not afraid of changing things around, learning about new places.

That sounds like a lot of long-haul flying – how do you handle that?

There are no bad bits of flying for me – except when people think the video in the back of the seat takes i-Phone pointing strength to make it work!

Is there a certain place in Australia that you’ve always wanted to see but haven’t yet?

To be honest, I’m one of the rare Australians who has travelled to the far-flung alcoves of this great nation. But I would like to see The Kimberley in greater detail – more than just the 48-hour turnover we have as performers coming in and out of places.

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AI Prompt

Is there a place in Australia you’ve been to that you wish you hadn’t – perhaps somewhere where your show didn’t get the best reaction?

I don’t think so. Having toured extensively as a stand-up for the best part of 28 years, I’ve been to so many places but each one brings up a certain kind of joy. Stand-up crowds just want a laugh and they don’t want you to be too up yourself.

All-time favourite place to stay in Australia?

Crowne Plaza at Terrigal (NSW Central Coast). I was a water aerobics instructor there during its early years and staying there makes me know I’m up on my beautiful Central Coast, docking back on my Mother Ship, in maximum luxury.

Where do you get your caffeine fix?

The airport cafes are my favourites – I use them a lot! There’s one place at Sydney airport, Trattoria Prego, that makes a sandwich out of this flaky pastry bread with little seeds on it. I wouldn’t pass through without going directly to it and buying one of those and a coffee.

I heard you were married in Las Vegas – why?

It just sounded fun. Dan’s from the UK and we had three countries where guests would have to come from so Vegas seemed like not only a half way point but a really fun point too. We did it on New Year’s Eve so we just had a massive party. Neither of us are gamblers, though, so I’m still not exactly sure how we ended up in Vegas.

What’s your ultimate holiday nightmare, real or imagined?

I’ve only just lived through it over the Christmas Holidays. I booked a holiday house online that looked amazing on the website. But it was possibly the dirtiest place I’ve ever been in. I couldn’t even turn a lamp off without going to the bathroom to wash my hands afterwards.

How is it travelling with your two young girls?

The girls have been looping around the planet since they were born – they are not going to appreciate their carbon footprint when I tell them the truth later. We have a real system in place, they are so used to flying now – and we don’t drug them! I like to joke when we get on the plane, and see people’s faces glaze over when they see they have to sit near to young kids; I say, “don’t worry, we’re going to drug them". They’re so well behaved after that people just assume we’ve drugged them anyway. It’s the only time they’re really sweet.

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Where did young Julia go for school holidays?

Both my parents worked full time so we didn’t go too flash. We would go to my parent’s friend’s place at McMasters Beach (NSW Central Coast). We would pack up the car like we were driving somewhere forever away and then just drive for 10 minutes and then immerse ourselves in Central Coast beach life. Those were the best holidays ever. Laugh, eat and get out on the beach!

How do rate Melbourne (since moving there last year for House Husbands) against some of the other cities you’ve lived in: Sydney, LA etc?

I never rate my cities against each other – because it allows me to have full love for every single city. I can’t turn my back on my own city though; every time I fly into Sydney, over that sexy old coat hanger, it makes me think “ohh, my city!". But now Melbourne is my city too – every city we live in we embrace like locals, as soon as possible.

What’s the tackiest souvenir you’ve ever bought?

I have a special gift in tacky souvenirs. I have a salt and pepper shaker which is a woman’s bust – it’s amazing. But there’s no such things as tacky – if it gives you joy and reminds you of a place then there’s always room for it in your home.

Absolute travel splash-out in Australia (time and money no object)?

The full top half, from Cairns and Port Douggy, all the way over to, and including and tickling, Broome. Just pop into Katherine, get Darwin involved, especially the wave machine pool.

That’s a long way – will you be doing the driving?

No, I think I’d have to be in some kind of a private plane situation, wouldn’t I. Never been in one but that’s how I see it.

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8 experiences to get the most out of Victoria’s Great Ocean Road

    Louis Costello Louis Costello
    Beyond the winding bitumen and coastal views lies another side to Victoria’s most famous route.

    There’s something hypnotic about this stretch of Victoria’s coast. Maybe it’s the way the road hugs the ocean so tightly, or how the cliffs catch the sun in colours you can’t name. Or, for local Victorians who drove this route as kids, maybe it’s the memories of winding through the impossibly tall trees as they seemingly guide you on your journey like wooden guardian angels. Most travellers know it for the 12 Apostles, but there are plenty of alternate experiences on the Great Ocean Road equally as worthy of your time.

    So, next time you’re in that neck of the woods, park that car, stretch those legs and try these experiences.

    1. Discover living culture at Budj Bim

    Budj Bim Cultural Landscape Tourism
    Walk across the world’s oldest known aquaculture system. (Image: Visit Victoria)

    Breakaway Creek’s Budj Bim Cultural Landscape is a masterclass in educational storytelling. Join a guided tour with Budj Bim Cultural Landscape Tourism to walk across the world’s oldest known aquaculture system, where the Gunditjmara people built sophisticated eel traps and stone channels more than 6,000 years ago.

    Budj Bim’s aquaculture system predates Egypt’s pyramids by roughly 2,000 years, making it one of the oldest examples of human engineering on Earth. If that’s not enough to get your history-loving family members involved in this road trip, we’re out of ideas.

    2. Unwind in the hot springs at Warnambool

    woman relaxing at Deep Blue Hot Springs
    Let mineral-rich water heal you.

    If your legs need a break after a long drive, Deep Blue Hot Springs is your remedy. The geothermal pools sit just metres from the coastline, filled with mineral-rich water that bubbles up from deep underground. Move between open-air baths, waterfall pools and quiet zones made for meditation.

    The water in Deep Blue’s geothermal pools comes from an ancient aquifer nearly 850 metres below the Earth’s surface, which, in non-scientific terms, means it’s far more likely to have healing properties than the mineral water you’d find at the supermarket.

    3. Take to the air at Princetown

    12 Apostles Helicopters flight alternate experiences on the Great Ocean Road
    See an icon from a different view.

    You may have seen the Twelve Apostles from the trusty viewing platform, but a helicopter flight with 12 Apostles Helicopters shows you just how sprawling and rugged this coastline really is.

    The trip covers everything from Port Campbell to London Bridge (not to be confused with the UK’s own), giving you a rare chance to watch waves carving the limestone cliffs from above. It’s worth noting that the limestone stacks of the Twelve Apostles are said to erode by roughly two centimetres each year, so the longer you leave it, the less of the Apostles you’ll see.

    4. Step into the past at Flagstaff Hill

    Flagstaff Hill Maritime Village and Museum
    Visit a time of yore.

    Continue the tour through Warnambool at Flagstaff Hill Maritime Village and Museum, a recreated 19th-century port town. Hear stories from the days when shipwrecks were as common as seagulls, with an astounding 180 ships believed to have sunk along the Shipwreck Coast in less than five years.

    The night show, complete with lights, sound, and sea spray, brings the coastline’s most dramatic stories to life.

    If you’re staying the night, Simon’s Waterfront offers relaxed dining with fresh local seafood and oceanfront views. Order the catch of the day and toast to the sailors who never made it ashore.

    5. Learn to surf in Torquay, Lorne, or Anglesea

    kid having a lesson with Go Ride A Wave
    Learn how to hang 10. (Image: Visit Victoria)

    Whether you’ve surfed before or can barely stand on a board, Go Ride A Wave will have you upright in no time. Torquay’s calm beaches are ideal for first-timers, while Lorne and Anglesea bring a bit more energy for those unafraid to get dunked.

    Bells Beach, just down the road from Torquay, has even hosted the world’s longest-running professional surfing competition since 1962. So, for those eager to have a gander at pros using surfboards like they’re an additional appendage, the competition usually runs sometime in autumn.

    6. Tackle the trails in Forrest

    Barwon Flow Trails Otways Flow MTB
    Hire a bike and explore MTB trails through the Otways.

    Forrest is a haven for mountain bikers thanks to an expansive network of trails through stunning natural scenery. The Forrest trail network has almost 100 kilometres of singletrack across 36 trails, so there’s something for every level of rider. That’s including more than 60 kilometres of purpose-built mountain bike trails winding through the Otways’ dense forest. Cycle through ancient myrtle beech trees and towering tree ferns, with smaller ferns and soft mosses forming a carpet at your feet.

    Hire a bike from Forrest MTB Hire and take your pick from easy, scenic rides to more challenging singletracks, such as Red Carpet or Rollercoaster.

    7. See wildlife up close in Apollo Bay

    bush rat on Wildlife Wonders tour
    Get help spotting the locals. (Image: Doug Gimsey)

    If spotting koalas and kangaroos in the wild feels like winning the lottery, Wildlife Wonders gives you guaranteed sightings without cages or crowds. Every visit to the sanctuary helps fund the Conservation Ecology Centre which supports endangered species across the Otways, so your business is appreciated by humans and animals alike.

    The guided walk takes you through protected Otways habitat where you might spot potoroos (or joey lookalikes for those unfamiliar with a potoroo), wallabies, and sleepy koalas lounging in the trees.

    8. Visit the Cape Otway Lightstation

    Cape Otway Lightstation
    Delve into the tales of Cape Otway Lightstation.

    Towering over the sea on a cliff above the Southern Ocean, Cape Otway Lightstation has been guiding ships since 1848. Before the lighthouse was built, Cape Otway was one of the most treacherous points on the Victorian coast, with dozens of shipwrecks occurring in its surrounding waters. Pick the right day, and you may bump into a local willing to tell you about the wreck of Eric the Red.

    While at the Cape Otway Lightstation, explore the keeper’s quarters, walk the coastal trails, and take in views that only stop short at the horizon.

    And no, contrary to popular belief, the Round the Twist lighthouse is actually located in Split Point, just shy of two hours in the direction of Melbourne. Nothing’s stopping you from embarking on a lighthouse crawl, though.

    Plan your next no-stone-unturned journey along this iconic Aussie road at visitgreatoceanroad.org.au.

    Julia Morris: A funny thing happened on my way today... - Australian Traveller