Ok, so I am a guy but people tell me I am not too bad on the romance stakes. The wife says it’s a bit inconsistent – it’s not daily.
But I hate Valentines day. It’s more than just the rampant commercialisation – it’s the crap that carries on around it. Here are the three worst things that happen on the day.
Office Pissing Contest
The procession of flowers that arrive at reception for some lucky girl to come and collect is tedious and unhelpful to the office.
It’s almost like a scoreboard for women – the size of the bouquet is a measure of the women’s ability to garner the devotion of some guy.
Not only is it pathetic and in reality these issues are best between a couple, but it is not great for office morale.
It’s Unimaginative
Beyond the commercialisation, it’s a manifestation of the most unimaginative lazy effort in a relationship imaginable. Anyone who goes all out on Valenitines day is, to me, not worth being in a relationship with. They do not have the personal fortitude to act in any imaginative way. They are nothing but sheep.
It’s a Victory of Style over Substance
The public song and dance for Valentines day is often more about each member of the relationship proudly showing off at the water cooler the next day. Its meaningless in reality.
So, if you want to avoid all this my tip is – do something special on the 12th. You don’t have the cost of the marked up 14th, it beats everyone else to the punch and it is a surprise.
Oh, and some ideas?
Well I reckon a photo book is pretty darn special these days – organising digital photos is such a pain, that the photo book is a decent solution.
I recently did one for my mum and dad’s 50th wedding anniversary and it was cheap and relatively painless. I used Album Works.
If you go for the hotel deal make sure you get something onto like a theatre deal – Sofitel are the guys I reckon who do a grand job of the theatre/arts package.
Happy un-Valentine!
Quentin Long is the Co-Founder and Managing Director of Australian Traveller Media. Quentin is a sought-after travel media commentator. He is Australia’s most trusted source for travel news and insights, having held weekly radio segments across the country since 2006, and regularly appearing on Channel 9’s Today and A Current Affair programs from 2010. Don't ask him his favourite travel experience as that's like asking him to choose a favourite child. However he does say that Garma Festival is the one travel experience that changed him the most.
A new wave of retreats, hotels, glamping sites and more is encouraging visitors to savour their time spent along the Great Ocean Road.
Long holding a place as one of Australia’s most rewarding drives, cliffs, curves and shifting coastal light continue to draw travellers to Victoria’s coastline year after year. What has evolved more quietly is the range of new accommodation along the Great Ocean Road to add new dimensions to the drive.
Rather than competing for attention, these stays are shaped by their settings. They sit beside rivers, among vines, on the edge of lakes and close to town centres where local life unfolds at an unhurried pace. Together, they point to a way of travelling the Great Ocean Road that values time spent in place, as much as distance covered.
1. The Monty, Anglesea
Pop into Nina Cantina for tacos and views.
Anglesea has always appealed to travellers drawn to a quieter stretch of coast, where surf culture, bushland and river scenery blend into one. The Monty complements that character with a recent rebrand and refresh with traditional beach road trip nostalgia in mind. Mid-century retro decor means rooms are contemporary and funky, without being over-styled.
A highlight of the stay is Nina Cantina, the on-site Mexican restaurant overlooking the Anglesea River. Opening in 2026, it will undoubtedly become a popular gathering point, bringing together locals, day trippers and overnight guests. Watch the river flow while tucking into plates of tacos, before enjoying a digestion swim in The Monty’s pool.
Mornings in Anglesea often begin quietly. Kangaroos are a familiar sight on the nearby golf course, and walking tracks wind through heathland that reflects the natural landscape of the Surf Coast. From here, the road south feels like a continuation rather than a departure, easing travellers into the next stretch of the journey.
2. Basalt Retreats, Port Fairy
Discover this new adults-only retreat.
Near Port Fairy, Basalt Retreats is an adults-only delight set among a 24-year-old vineyard at Basalt Wines. The accommodation is a mixture of luxury and linens (and ultra comfy beds), allowing the long stretches of grapes to take centre stage. As the sun sets, Basalt Retreats settles into stillness. With minimal light pollution, the night sky becomes part of the experience, and star-searchers will delight in the uninterrupted views of our vast universe.
See Poombeeyt Koontapool from the lookout.
Staying along the Great Ocean Road western region gives you en route access to coastal landmarks. A visit to Poombeeyt Koontapool at Loch Ard Gorge is a must for those fascinated by natural blowholes, with enough walking trails to tucker out the most seasoned hiker.
The Poorpa Yanyeen Meereeng Trail between Timboon and Port Campbell reveals how wetlands, farmland and coastline connect across the region, best appreciated on foot or by bike.
3. Lake Colac Holiday Park, Colac
Book into a cabin at Lake Colac Holiday Park.
Lake Colac Holiday Park introduces new cabin accommodation set along the edge of a broad volcanic lake. The cabins are modern and light-filled, designed to make the most of the water views and open skies.
Lake Colac plays an important role in local life, hosting community events and everyday rituals alike. Staying here offers insight into the agricultural heart of the Great Ocean Road region, where the pace is shaped by seasons rather than sightseeing schedules.
Have a delicious lunch, then join a farm tour at Brae Restaurant. (Image: Visit Vic)
Colac’s central location places visitors within reach of standout regional experiences. Otways Distillery’s Birregurra cellar door reflects the surrounding forest in its approach to spirits. While Brae Restaurant’s guided farm and kitchen garden tours offer a closer look at the land that underpins its acclaimed dining. Together, they highlight the strong connection between produce, place and people.
4. Glamping tents, Apollo Bay Recreation Reserve
Take a breather in Apollo Bay with brand new glamping tents.
Back on the coast, Apollo Bay has always been known to be a natural place to take a breather, sitting roughly at the Great Ocean Road’s midway point. The brand-spanking new glamping tents at the Apollo Bay Recreation Reserve offer comfortable accommodation that remains closely connected to the outdoors. With ensuite bathrooms and thoughtfully designed interiors, the cabin-tent hybrids offer enough privacy and luxuries to make the trip feel more luxurious than your standard camping affair.
Set near the river and within walking distance of the town centre, the location allows guests to move easily between beach walks, forest drives and relaxed meals.
A session at The Corner Sauna fits naturally into a stay here. The wood-fired sauna has become part of Apollo Bay’s way of life, offering warmth and restoration after time spent in the elements (also known as a frolic at the beach).
Enjoy fresh seafood at Apollo Bay Fishermen’s Co-op.
Apollo Bay has enough to entertain and dazzle travellers more than your average town. Graze on fresh seafood at local cafes – like Graze or Apollo Bay Fishermen’s Co-op – before venturing to nearby waterfalls. Spend hours kayaking among real-life seals, try your hand at surf lessons taught by understanding and patient guides, or simply spend your days reading a book while the surf crashes in front of you.
Together, these new accommodation openings highlight the Great Ocean Road’s continued evolution. With more places that invite travellers to slow down and stay a little longer, the journey becomes less about rushing between landmarks and more about engaging with the unique towns along the way.
